This time last year my biggest concern was getting to Cori. I was sewing these matching dresses as therapy to survive the months when I thought we would already have had her in our arms. Now I know God's timing is perfect. But now I know that even US pediatricians and endocrinologists have never seen her condition! So many people say, "Bless you for what you have taken on." We were clueless! So were the Chinese doctors and the first two US professionals! Do you really want to know in advance the trials and tests that will come your way?

We would have missed all of these precious faces if we had known all God knew.

Only two specialists in Cincinnati have seen her file and they want 8 days for diagnostics alone. If we had gone with the local urologist plan then we would lose the option of a bowel plan in the future.

In the final analysis, this is just a child. A brilliant and beautiful child, who was abandoned the days she was born. She needs some surgery. It is serious surgery. There is no "normal" for our children. You know what, I am not normal!!!! I am crippled, as Dr. Jim Henry so beautifully articulated this Sunday. It is easier to overlook the mental and spiritual and emotional wheelchairs we all ride in......but I have the unique blessing of being reminded every single day that I am not equipped . I offer nothing. I have nothing. And if I do not seek the throne of grace, then I am road kill. I have not one single second of personal victory. And yet I praise God! If I was adequate in any single way of my own self, I would not have to fall on my face before HIS throne. I am a goner. I am a failure. I offer nothing.

But I am so completely grateful that that condition throws me to the altar. It is my most earnest cry that all that I love find themselves unable to walk another day without the presence and Grace of God most high.

Very very discouraging news today

We had hoped this massively talented and well trained guy who makes presentations to the best and brightest would be able to handle Cori locally. Not so. And he was realistic about her lifetime prognosis, I had to come home and go to bed. So, here we are. It took 15 months to get Cori out of China. It has taken 9 months for the locals to admit they are above their pay grade. And it will take about two weeks for the best and brightest to say what she needs....but we are also told she will never be normal. Never. Jena's mouth will never work right. She will never hear right. Lily may never overcome living in a police station, an orphanage, a hospital, a foster home, and then with us. But this day Cori's daddy held her and showed her the toys. He colored with her. He asked her if she was Daddy's girl, and while she colored his pictures and kissed him on the cheek, she said, " No, I am Mommy's girl." Again tonight, she woke us up in torture for her bottom is raw with urine. And all of our eyes are full of tears.

Oh, happy birthday. You are here with us for this one!

Cori's birthday was May 26. Two years ago on that date, Holt Adoption Agency interviewed us for 90 minutes on a conference call about selecting our family to adopt Cori. We got off the phone and said either they loved us or hated us. We had picked out new countertops for the kitchen in the event they said no. Two days later, on our 26th wedding anniversary, Holt called to say yes! We laughed about the countertops.

Last year on May 26, I cried. I had wanted to have her in my arms by then. We were able to send her a cake and two days later, on our 27th wedding anniversary, we got to see those pictures. They were like water in the desert.

This year, she is ours.

Wes joked last year that the $90 it took to send her a cake and the $35 we paid for the pictures was still cheaper than Chuckie Cheese. Guess where we took her this year?

The grandmothers hated it, of course. But Wes's mother just kept saying how completely adorable she is. (His mom has gotten more and more beautiful every one of her 75 years.)

We showed Cori the pictures of her birthday last year. She only knew herself. A couple of months ago we showed her a picture of Cori with her foster mom and asked her who that was. She pointed to me and said, "You."

Well, that sounds pretty healthy to me, although I do have all of my teeth. But that anonymous woman poured herself into this most amazing child and then she let her go.

As Cori turns four, I pray God tells her what a good job she did, and that her fiery eyed Yi Hua is doing very very well.

Than you God. You gave me children I did not bear in my body. You let me raise girls another mother could not. Please, pour out the blessing of Yourself on them!

Cori's First Trip to the Beach

It has always felt like a big deal the first time we take our children to the beach, especially for our adopted children. To think they would not have seen the vast ocean or built a sand castle or chased sea gulls down the shore.............We are just so thankful that we got to do this with them! Cori loved it from the very beginning. Her peals of laughter surely must have reached some far away dolphin ears and brought them near the shore to see what was up. Watching her big sisters take her into the ocean and the pool where they loved being a part of her first time was deeply rewarding.

When we adopt we are giving our older children something rare and special, but we are also asking them to give up some of our time and money and freedoms. We are asking them to take on more responsibility.

So to Jessica, Taylor, Blake, Katherine, and Grace I want to say, "Thank you. We are so proud of you and love you so very much! You are wonderful big siblings. We could not do this without your support."

Cincinnati Children's Hospital now has all of Cori's medical files and we expect to be hearing from them this week about an appointment soon. Thank you for praying that we get her to the absolute best specialists.

Cori's First Easter

First Easter as a Wright has been important to us since Jena's adoption. We have a special wall with that picture beside a water color from Susan Crouch made especially for the girls. A rose for Jena Rose, and Lily for Lily Renae. Last week Cori pointed to that wall and asked, " Where Cori?" We told her it would happen soon.

This Easter will be in my memory for many years. Praise and worship was awesome. The message fro Bruce Frank was to the wall. Over 9000 people came to church in 4 services. My teen daughters served the children in AMP every service. The lines to church were a mile long on the interstate.....and it was well worth the wait!

This Easter was the end of a week long fast. It was truly a blessing. For some reason, Wes and I never had a night alone during this week. Every night we had one or two daughters in bed with us. So Sunday came, and the tomb is empty!

We went to lunch and took Cori's picture. Wes took them back to the Easter Egg Scramble. By the time she got home she was sweaty, full of and empty of sugar, and in a full tantrum. I picked her up and took her to the hall. All of that hair was in her face. She was still crying. I showed her the matted and framed picture on the wall...........her face burst into smiles. I am on the wall with my sisters! I am a Wright.

It was glorious. It was an undeserved moment of complete joy for us.

This is the picture she saw on her first celebration of Christ arisen from the grave. She ate all the food and then she spent the rest of her day beside her grandmother, Wes' mom, Janna Whitley Wright.

There is a wealth that no one can measure. It is most easily perceived by those who have suffered the most loss................quote from Stephanie Cox Wright.

Hard thing to admit...We trusted the wrong people

Well, we are having a parent fail. Our pediatrician examined Cori. Then an endocrinologist. No one ever said the words..."Cloaca Anomoly." Yet, the peds urologist who told us this child would need one simple surgery had declared her condition as such before he ever examined her. What is going on here?

We posted these and other questions on a blog we trust. We have had a resounding response that we must take Cori to Children's Hospital in Cincinnati, Ohio. It is the only pediatric colo-rectal center in this country. It kills me to think we trusted our pediatrician, who sent us to the local guy who mostly does circumcisions.

Is it possible that we let a guy operate on her who has only limited experience in this area? Please, God, no.

We have to wait for a referral from the pediatrician who examined her first who never mentioned cloaca anomoly.

Mr. Expert declared such before he ever saw her anatomy. Then he said it was a simple fix. Then her said the incontinence was temporary. Then he said he told us she might never re-achieve continence............While never admitting that she was completely continent in China and add days before his "corrective" surgery.

This is a child of God, not an experiment. PLEASE pray that God makes the way for the full truth, makes insurance pay, and restores her to dignity.

PS....if you read this and are on board, would you consider emailing me at anniewright@bellsouth.net?

What did abandoned kids experience?

A much better writer and public speaker published her blog yesterday about how much trauma her abandoned two year old son experienced that she will never know. It sounded a bell in my heart. This blog has been about Cori, but she would never be with us if we had not gone on a journey 7 years ago for Jena and 5 years ago for Lily. Last night was a big reminder as our region experienced violent and destructive storms. Lily wrapped her long and skinny body around mine from fear. She used to wake up in the car and she went ballistic if she did not know where we were. On our second trip to the beach she managed to lock herself into a closet. When I found her she was soaked in sweat and said she never wanted to go to the beach again. She was 7 weeks old when her mother left her at the base of a statue in a public park. She used to bite herself and bang her head on the floor. Today she melted in grief because Cori made a face at her. How can we fix what we do not know? Only God can do that. ......God, please enable us to be what our children really need.

Jena was 12 weeks old when she was abandoned. We know for a fact that her orphanage is a desperate place. One day after we got her she saw the orphanage director. She poured out silent tears that covered her shirt. She used to break down for no reason we could imagine. She was 6 before this stupid state would agree she was deaf......and even after 7 years of our unconditional love and her father's worship......she pulls our her eyelashes and eyebrows at night.

Her daddy was in the yard with her this weekend. The insurance is refusing to pay or the dr that puts the device in her mouth that holds the bone graft from her hip together. Her hip is still black......that was July 3 of last year.

Wes has said that if we won the publisher's house sweepstakes he would build a wing and bring in another dozen.

But last year we paid over 1 sixth of his take home pay for medical bills....not counting what he pays out of pocket to get the coverage. Not counting dental or prescriptions.

Whine whine whine.

And this relentless old woman keeps bringing faces before him.

So...you read because of Cori. We will get a second opinion the end of April......but all research says that the only way a child with her condition achieves urinary continence is with a catheter.

Good news.....it will be in her stomach, not her private access. She is in daily pain for the rash her condition causes. I found $10 plus wipes and we are trying combination of lotrimon af and cortizone to relieve her pain. She cries out....you hurt my bum. Breaks our hearts.