"It's the most wonderful time of the year"

Gay happy greetings when friends come to call. If you come to call, I will find a weapon.

So, we bought the tree Monday night in 19 degree snowy weather. The "guy" with the tree really wants us to consider the one that has a bad spot in the back, because normally this would be a $150 tree. Well over 11 feet, full, but with one bad spot. Wes, who loves a bargain, takes it. The tree is too big for the netting so I should drive home slow. No problem. It is a blizzard on I 40 that night.

We get it in. Wes puts it in the stand. It falls. Another effort. It falls. We discover that the trunk has split. Wes takes off in the snow to get a bigger stand.

That is when the real fun started. Cori begins to projectile vomit. In the basement. In the diningroom. In the hall. In the bedroom....that took two towels. In the tub. After the tub. Dad gets back with the miracle stand. She is still going. She finally falls asleep in my arms around 11:30. I get ready for bed and bring her into ours. Next morning......diaper and bed have the evidence of her diarrhea. Lovely. Today, 8 year old sister Jena has the vomiting.

Wes comes home and we decorate the tree. We make sure that every limb and spot is perfect. We are, after all, a marriage of a first born and an only child.

It surely cannot matter that the back is barren because we will slide that into the corner.

Looking great. Time to slide it into the corner. Fully decorated with 30 years of ornaments.

Of course, you know the rest of the story. Wes is on the floor when it begins to fall so I run to grab it. Lily looks as if she just saw the Twin Towers fall. Jena goes to bed. Grace climbs her bunk. Wes utters some non-printable oaths and tells me to get out of the tree, which I cannot accomplish because I am caught in the beading. Re-group. Sweep up the shattered ornaments. Bravely Katherine and I push the tree back up as Wes manages the new, huge stand. Effort. Small attempts to back away. Finally the three brave ones, Wes, Stephanie, Katherine all stand back.....and it falls again. I ask Wes to go outdoors for a few minutes.

Cori begins to scream from her diaper rash. Grace is still hiding. Lily is upset that her angel lost its head. Jena suddenly feels better.

Folks have asked me today if the tree is now firewood. These folks do not know my husband. He did not quit on the tree when he bashed his head on the door frame, and he will not quit on it now. It is secured with a bungy cord attached to a 25 pound weight. He plans to add another tonight.

Cori went threw a bath, another towel, three more middle of the night diaper changes, and then Wes went to get more diapers and a better rash cream.

The volume of her urine is massive and it smells old even as it first fills the diaper. We need God's wisdom about what this means.

And when you read this, pray that God continues to grant us good humor, even if it takes a couple of days.